90 Days Is All It Takes

Wow... I can't believe how long it's been since I blogged here. It's not for lack of examining my life... that's for sure. But I guess you could say I've been trying to "DO the impossible" just like the title of my most recent post before this one (February 17, 2010).

The "impossible" that I've attempted to do (not very successfully, I might add) is to do too many things simultaneously. As you can imagine, this is NOT a winning strategy.

But it's a familiar strategy for me, unfortunately. If you look back to the post prior to that one (February 1, 2010), titled "Are You Stuck In A Rut?", I was saying exactly what I'm saying now. It's obvious that I've still been stuck in a rut myself, even though I can TALK about learning from the errors of my ways and doing better.

Getting bored yet??? Sorry...

Well, I know I'm tired of this merry-go-round I've been on, and I know YOU don't want to read about me being stuck in the same rut forever! How depressing that would be!

So what am I doing about it? And what can YOU do if you're in a similar situation?

First off... I was amazed to re-read that February 17th post, "How Can You Do the Impossible?" That's some great advice I had discovered, and it's perfect for getting us UNstuck. But it's about time I DO what it says instead of just quoting it.

Second, I watched a great video by Vic Johnson. (I'll give you the link to it in a minute.) He says it's not too late for a turnaround, even when you're 3/4 of the way through the year. Using the analogy of a football game's 4th Quarter, he shows how 90 days - 1/4 of a year - is plenty of time for a comeback.


Forget about the first three quarters where you didn't score any touchdowns.

Focus on what's left, get to work, and refuse to believe you will lose!

Don't even entertain that negative thought. Just concentrate on what you need to DO to make it happen.

"You've still got time to have the greatest comeback in history. The 4th quarter is plenty of time for you to reach your goal."
~ Vic Johnson

He goes on to explain "90 days is a long time. You can grow a crop in 90 days."

- Corn takes about 90 days from seed planting to harvesting.
- A small business can go from idea to launch inside of 90 days.
- We go from the dead of winter to the flowers of spring in 90 days.
- The US Marines train recruits into top "fighting machines" in 90 days.

Well, I'm taking the challenge. I'm determined to make some changes. I've been "examining myself" and not liking everything about where I'm at... so it's time to do something differently!

You can see Vic Johnson's video here.

How Can You Do The Impossible?

Are you facing a challenge you don't quite know how to deal with? Do your problems appear to have no solution?

Or maybe you know about a possible solution, but you're scared to try it. You feel inadequate. Overwhelmed. It's unfamiliar territory. "What if I fail?"

I can totally relate, as I'm experiencing several new challenges myself... walking paths I've never walked before... making decisions that might not always be the best ones. It's easy to feel scared and alone when facing what seems to be an impossible task.

You'll like this, though...

Someone shared a few xeroxed pages with me a while back. I don't even recall who it was, but these pages turned up yesterday at exactly the time I needed a huge reminder that I can do the impossible. It's apparently from a small book with short devotionals called "Thought Conditioners".

I don't know what book the copies were made from, unfortunately, so I can't give credit to the author. But I really want to share this "formula" with you anyway.

It starts with a scripture from Luke 18:27... "The things which are impossible with men are possible with God."

Five basic steps are then laid out:

1. Size up your problem
2. Pray about it
3. Do all you can about it
4. Dont' give up; Don't worry; Stay calm
5. Affirm: "The things which are impossible with men are possible with God."

A few more great tips are given, too. They're simple, but powerful if you can lay hold of them:

• Never think, "this can't be done."
• Declare, "it can be done, it is being done, because God is doing it through me."

Isn't that great? How empowering to realize that you and God are a team effort in solving the problem.

And a big part of you doing your part on this team is to "declare" and "affirm" the positive outcome. "Affirm that the process is in operation."

See how that works? You declare it's not only possible, but is already happening. Remember... say "it can be done, it is being done..." This helps your faith to rise up to believe things are already getting better. It helps you have peace and confidence instead of feeling helpless and worried.

Speaking the right words and thinking the right thoughts are SO important! (You'll hear me say that many times as you get to know me.)

Quoting the rest of it now...

"The final outcome may not be entirely what you now desire. But, handled in this manner, the solution will be what God wants it to be."

I hope this blesses you! Take care, my friend, and never give up hope.

Are You Stuck In A Rut?

You'll notice it's been ages since I updated this blog. I've gone in too many directions all at the same time, and therefore have accomplished little that I intended to. However, I'm still "examining" myself on a regular basis and learning from the errors of my ways. So.....

I'm back!

And I'm eager to provide you with great self-help content on a much more regular basis. YOU come first, and I'll be sharing ideas that can help you develop your potential in life... along with my own challenges and victories you can perhaps learn from.

Today I have a neat little video for you. It's short and uses humor to make a point.





Can you relate? I sure can! That's why I am narrowing my focus so I can do a great job in a few areas, instead of spreading myself too thin to do anything well.

If you would like a little help in setting priorities and creating a better plan for your life, I would highly recommend checking out the site mentioned in the video.

Did I tell you that it's time sensitive? The last day you can get in is February 15th... so don't put it off.

Until next time...

Take care, and God bless!
Arline

Almost Too Much!

It's been a few weeks since I wrote..... But it's not due to lack of discoveries about myself!

In fact, my openness to seeing my shortcomings has provided plenty of new revelations. It's almost too much information. I've been so busy processing the info that I hardly knew how to write about it.

But this is a good thing. That's the whole point... to be open to recognizing areas I need to improve.

It was also good for me to take a little break, including time for a trip out of state (which is something I rarely do). Being immersed for a week in a totally different environment was refreshing. It also helped me see life... and myself... from a different perspective. Certain things have become so much clearer.

One fault I was already aware of (talking too much) took on 3-D status during my trip. I found a whole new dimension to the issue that I hadn't been totally aware of before. "Thank you" to the people who shared their insights with me. I'll discuss this more in a future blog post.

Something else has become crystal clear to me: It's important that I be totally honest with you, and true to my own convictions in my writings.

I've had a tendency toward making my comments sort of "politically correct", sort of "one-size-fits-all", to write about self-improvement in general. Yes, I did mention that self-examination is a scriptural concept. I touched on my beliefs, but only in passing.

I'm now realizing that I need to express my thoughts and insights honestly, and hold nothing back. My blogging should be totally consistent with my own Christian perspective of things, because how else can I reveal what I'm really learning? I can't "water down" the message to avoid offending someone, or to make the message fit everyone.

People will either like what I write, or they won't; but I have to be true to me. That's the only way my writings will have any reality to them! And it's the only thing that gives this blog a chance of actually being helpful to anyone.

Like they say, "you have to stand for something, or you'll fall for anything". I need to share with you what I stand for. If I don't write with passion and conviction, it won't bless or edify anyone... including myself.

You see, self-improvement in my life is totally within the context of "Christ in me, the hope of glory", and "Without Him, I can do nothing (of any lasting value)." But "I can do all things through Christ who gives me the strength." I personally don't try to improve myself in a vacuum, apart from my relationship with my Savior.

I know God has to help me in this journey. A person can try to improve himself/herself... and have some degree of success, perhaps, apart from Christ. However, as a believer in Christ, I know from personal experience how infinitely much better it is to let Him be in charge of my life, let Him help me see what needs to change, and then let Him come in and make the repairs!

He made me in the first place, and He knows how to fix the things I've messed up. He is awesome!

There's one more thing I want to touch on today. Probably all of us still have scars from our childhood, or more recently, that we need to be healed from. Many times we're not aware of them consciously. But as we seek to improve ourselves, the awareness might come forward... especially if we're asking God to show us.

I'm not saying we should do a lot of deliberate "digging" into our past, looking for old wounds. To me, it's best to just be open and let things surface by themselves, because there is a proper timing to all this.

For example, I recently had an experience where something triggered unexpected emotions. So, when this happened, I took time to reflect on it... and I soon understood the buried reason for the sadness I was feeling. I now know there's an old hurt I will need to deal with and be healed from.

Meanwhile, I'm at an interesting and challenging cross-roads in my life this year. Just as I was in the process of retiring from my job of 22 years so that my husband Tom and I could pursue our dream of starting an Internet-based business at home, the unthinkable happened.

Oh, I retired all right... and I am working on getting the business going. But simultaneously with my April 1st retirement, Tom was suddenly dying of esophagus cancer. He passed away April 5th, less than 3 months after his diagnosis. So our dream isn't happening exactly the way we had envisioned it!

I am still excited to be retired and following my passion... while also dealing with sadness over my loss.

So now I'm in a time of transition, and a time of reflecting over my years of marriage and parenting. There was lots of baggage along with the successes and good times, I can assure you. Not everything was fun and games. We made lots of mistakes.

Right now is a perfect time for examining myself, and for personal growth. I've been working with a trained grief counselor as I go through this challenging phase of my life. My new friends at a Christian grief support group really help, too. Most of all, the Holy Spirit really is a "comforter" to me, just as Jesus promised to his disciples before He went back to heaven.

Even though I am grieving my loss, I also feel a great sense of hope about my future. I don't know just where life's journey will take me, but I do know I'm in good hands. I know God has a plan for my life. This time of transition is launching me into new adventures. I know it will all work out okay.

By the way, I highly recommend professional counseling (and/or an appropriate support group) for anyone who feels they could use a kickstart to getting over some hurdles you might be facing. There's nothing wrong with getting some extra help and mentoring along the road to self-improvement. I should have done it years ago! But better late than never at all.

God bless you on your journey! Until next time...

Arline

Okay... I GET it!

I recently had one of my faults brought to my attention. It was actually kind of funny. It was something I already knew about myself, but now that I'm "examining myself", it seemed like events transpired to really bring it home.

I've been wanting to share this with you for a few days now, but I keep being busy, between getting ready for a trip, and technical issues taking up my extra time.

Notice that last sentence above. While it is quite true, it is also quite long! That sentence is a great example of how not to write well. It's also a sample of my natural writing (and speaking) style. It's easy for me to use waaaaay too many words to say something. It's harder for me to be brief and to the point. That's one thing I work on in my writing. Being concise is one of the things I'm trying to improve about myself.

Which brings me to the events a few days ago. Because I really tend to use too many words when I talk! And of course I don't have the option to edit spoken words like I do with written communication.

So what were the events? Two incidents happened in the same day that both had the same obvious theme.

First, I was working on my "About Me" blurb in the right column of this blog. I had typed a whole lengthy story of my life, including my Internet misadventures over the past eight plus years... and finally I hit the SAVE button. Lo and behold, I had exceeded the limit of words. It could have told me sooner, stopped me from writing any more, or something... but no. It waited until I made a total fool of myself and spent all that time rambling on and on.

Well, that was the written part of the self-examination, self-realization "test"... and I had flunked it.

Later that same day, I had the spoken words exercise. This was the funny one... embarassing, yes, but it had me chuckling at myself. And, yeah, I flunked this part of the "test", too.

I was on the phone with another middle-aged lady. She had brought up some philosophical subject, and I had gotten long-winded about it. I was sharing my take on things, hopefully encouraging her in the right direction toward a more fulfilling life. At first I could hear her saying "Mmm-hmm" or making other comments. But at some point I realized I was rambling on into dead silence.

Now, when I mentioned earlier that I had been having technical issues, one of them is that two of my telephones are simultaneously dying of old age! Just in the past three weeks! One phone won't even dial any more because the touchtones don't register. I can answer it, but there's a loud buzzing in the background. The other phone doesn't hold a charge for very long.

That's the one I was talking on. I had already heard the "beep" that alerted me the battery was low. But it was still working, so I kept on chatting back and forth with my friend. By the time I got on a roll, I had forgotten all about the low battery. So that's how God got my attention. The phone just died while I was rambling on and on. I got "put in my place" for saying waaaaaaay too many words on the subject!

When I realized I'd been talking on and on to no one, I also realized I had been saying pretty much the same thing over and over, just in different words, for the past few minutes! Wow, Arline, you really need to learn when to stop talking!!! I had already made my point, but then I just kept going over the subject like an out-of-control bulldozer. (Can you say "Overkill"?)

"Yes, Lord, I get it! You're reminding me that I talk too much."

I think there's a verse that goes something like "Let your words be few, and seasoned with salt." Or maybe that's a couple of verses mixed together. Anyway, it's a great principle to strive for. Our words should give life and be uplifting, not trample people or bore them to death. A few words, "seasoned" properly, will be edifying.

On the other hand, too many words are sure to bring problems. "When words are many, transgression is not lacking, but he who restrains his lips is prudent." (Proverbs 10:19 RSV)

So that's something I'm working on. Wish me luck!

Okay, I've said enough words for this post, so it's time to stop.

Until next time.......
Happy discovering!

Self Improvement Begins With Self Examination

Hello, and welcome to my Self Improvement blog. We all desire to make ourselves "better" in some way or another. My goal with this blog is to share lots of self-improvement tips, and to share glimpses of my own journey.

I have called this "The Self-Examined Life" because we have to take a good look at ourselves first. Then we can decide what we need to work at improving.

This principle is true in our spiritual walk. You may be familiar with the scripture that says something like "Examine yourself to see whether you be in the faith." Apparently, it's easy to drift off-course and not realize it. That's why we're reminded of the need to "examine yourself" to be sure we're still true to our purpose.

The same principle of self-examination applies in the other areas of our lives, too. It's easy to look at people around us and see what we think are flaws and shortcomings. But it's not so easy to scrutinize ourselves. That's why we need to train ourselves to look closely at our own lives so we can recognize what needs to be changed and improved.

I'll be posting thoughts that occur to me along my self-improvement journey. So, check back regularly to see my latest posts. Hopefully you will be motivated, encouraged and inspired by some of them.

I've recently created a self improvement website where you can find some useful resources. Have a look at:

http://www.learnskills4success.com/self-improvement

Please feel free to make comments on this blog. I look forward to sharing the journey with you.